Episode 12: Clash over supermodels

He says:

I’m tired of people saying supermodel women are dumb.

Come on, women think men, who have a sense of humour, rule. Does that mean every man with no sense of humour is a loser? I think models with great bodies rock.

They are certainly among the most intelligent women ever created. They are management gurus really.

Models really do their SWOT analysis pretty early in life. SWOT, if you are not a model or a management person, means a detailed review of your strengths, weaknesses, opportunities and threats.

Strengths: Their basic natural resources. What God blessed them with and what they can possibly boost up with man-made technology with a little investment? They know the short cut to success: showbiz, which has very basic eligibility criteria. Their basic intelligence tells them they can put the rest of it (the intelligence, that is) to better use, in real life projects that have to do with the actual application of beauty.
Formula one: Beauty plus attitude equals sexy.

Weaknesses: They know that whatever they do, they are going to be considered `bimbos’ because they are so hot. So they decide to ignore what other women and loser-men think. And capitalise on their weakness too. They play dumb.
Because, formula two goes: beauty plus dumbness, for any man, is cute.

Opportunities: Training that does not cost as much as your management degree would. They just need a cat around and follow its footsteps. This walk comes in handy, because it not only helps you climb the corporate ladder in the long run because beauty pageants are called personality contests and winning one does make you an official authority on Mother Teresa and a messiah of social consciousness. So even after retirement as a model, the catwalk would help in climbing up the corporate escalator.
Formula three: Beauty, plus purpose and personality, means project leader/marketing head.

Threats: Other women. And THAT, they can deal with. Because, the competition is really not that much and the world, is surely, more than enough for all of them to rule.
Formula four: Beauty plus beauty, is, a joy forever.

She says:

I’m tired of people saying that supermodels are dumb.
But for completely different reasons.

I don’t think women with great bodies `rock.’ As for male models, they’re not even tempting. Which woman wants to share her hair products and under eye creams. Or be elbowed out of her mirror-space every morning and evening. Besides, there’s something distinctly eerie about a man who uses more makeup than you do.

But supermodels. You have got to hand it to them. They do a pretty good job of working on what they’ve got. Though, of course, only a man could say it’s done with `a little investment.’

I hate to break this to you guys, but those girls on the cover of glossy magazines didn’t just tumble into the photo studio straight from… um… management class. Their hair’s been coloured, straightened, tinted, glossed, styled and sprayed. Their pouts are often perfected in expensive clinics. Their teeth are whitened, their noses tweaked. They have personal trainers, beauticians, masseurs, shoppers…

Not that it matters, really. It’s tough work, and if it pays off, it’s worth it. Otherwise, you’re just a pretty girl standing in line with a whole lot of other pretty girls at some lecherous B-grade producer’s office. Especially if you’re not the brightest lipstick in the make-up tray, and therefore can’t plot, plan and claw your way to the top. (The only way you can catwalk up a ladder is if you are actually a cat.)

Not surprisingly, real women don’t hate models. So that spirited defence of them and their management skills is really quite unnecessary.

We think they’re nice to look at too. And they make brilliant clothes hangers. And we’d be the first to complain if men started running around trees with each other in soggy songs and dance scenes in the movies.

But — and I think I speak for a large number of women — we wouldn’t want to be them.

It’s means too much hard work. And too few chocolate covered doughnuts.

Because, beauty plus beauty isn’t really that much fun.

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One response to “Episode 12: Clash over supermodels

  1. Janaki

    Way to go , enjoyed reading it:)

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